rlmeufandomcom-20200215-history
RLM Expanded Universe Wiki
Welcome to the RLM Expanded Universe Wiki The Unofficial Expanded Red Letter Media Universe, covering all the Plinkett continuity and HitB mythology. Also, Erotic Fan Art and Fan Fiction The Avengers Initiative In the year 1997, Harry Plinkett was contacted by famous life guard NICK FURY to take part in the Avengers Initiatve, a small, low rent security force designed to watch over HOLLYWOOD VIDEO stores. The actual meeting itself was not documented, but it resulted in Plinkett's refusal, a sentiment he puncuated by stabbing Nick Fury in the eye with an empty beer bottle. Fury was taken to the hospital; he lost all use of the damaged eye. In the mean time, Plinkett was not seen until he resurfaced in an alley near a movie theater two years later, sleeping with the rats and ejaculating blood into the sewers. The police approached Plinkett to arrest him. Eyewitnesses say Plinkett stood up and began swearing uncontrollably at the officers, telling them "I've been wating twenty-two goddamn years for this fucking movie! You'll never catch me, coppers!" Plinkett scrambled down the alley way, evading the police officers. The official report claimed the chase dragged on for almost two hours. However, Mrs. Ropple, whose apartment overlooked the alley, testified that the police officers gave up after about three minutes. Plinkett, for his part, kept running, at one point attempting to jump a fence. Unfortunately, because of Plinkett's size and age he did not make it, causing his leg to get tangled in the barbed-wire fence. Frightened and trapped, Plinkett began calling out for George Lucas to help him. He also kept screaming that he "needed to see this fuckin movie" or he would "fuckin' blow up a truck full of babies, and punt Air Bud into a fuckin' river." Legendary film director Michael Bay and his longtime collaborator, producer of such well known Oscar winners as "Pirates of the Carribbean 4: The Search For Money", and "Prince of Persian Rugs," Jerry Bruckheimer, heard Plinkett's pleas and attempted to come to his aid. Plinkett's screams grew angrier and more intense at the sight of the two Hollywood titans. "Get away from me, you fuckin' piece of shit hacks. You owe me 18 bucks for fuckin' Armageddon! You give me that fuckin' money, and you give it now!" With that, Plinkett produced from somewhere on his person a variety of blunt objects, and started hurling them at the filmmakers. One such item, a two-tape VHS copy of "Titanic," struck Bay in the head, causing him to go into a coma. When Bay eventually revived, he immediately wanted to start work on his next project. Fearing for the director's health, the producers suggested to that he might not be fully recovered, encouraging him to give his recovery more time, but he refused. Bay completed the film on schedule and it was hailed as "something a person with no brain capacity could have made." Michael Bay continued to suffer the long-term effects of his injuries. However, it is suggested that the first film he will have made after full recovery was the feature film Pearl Harbor. In the aftermath of his own ordeal, Plinkett grew tired of "fuckin waiting on this stupid fence," so he decided to remove his own leg. After sawing at it for over 45 minutes, he reduced the trapped leg to a stump and hobbled to the theater to see the new Star Wars picture which opened that same night. Nick Fury died seven weeks later of Alcohol poisoning. Latest activity Category:Browse